objnoob, thank you for your response. That is what I needed. To ALL the rest of you (who all ASSUMED that I don't have access to my own PHP.ini file, who ASSUMED that I wanted to have to all of a sudden have my Registered Globals ON, who ASSUMED that I don't know about the security risks, who ASSUMED that never try to emulate an environment to make things safer, and who ASSUMED that all you have to do is make "Auth=1" and now you have root), here's a little link for ya: http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Assume
Now I know where all the people from the '90's Perl Newsgroup hang out.