Can you please send me a poster size picture of yourself then?
My main gripe with SMF's plugin solution is that you generally need to hack the core or at least a theme to get things working. Searching for specific strings of code and replacing them with other strings of code. If it did you "hooks" (I know you say it does but I haven't seen or used any) it would be much cleaner.
The entire code bass is a bit of a mess in my opinion, but then again, I work in a completely OOP environment generally and most things are separated properly into the appropriate layer.
Your not alone here however. IMO there aren't too many open source apps around in PHP that are that well designed. I think it's just what happens when projects get a larger code base and don't have enough "bigger picture" design applied to them.