Which would you choose and why?

[.josh]

Okay here's a question I randomly thought up. Yes I'm a halfwit but I thought I'd see what all you really smart people had to say about it, nonetheless. So anyways, here it goes:

Let's say you have a list of 100,000 people.  This list is on paper.  I imagine more than one paper, as you would have to write really really small if it were on only one paper.  You might even have to use a magnifying glass or something.  So let's assume this list of people is spread out over several papers.  This list is not ordered in any particular way; it is not alphabetical, sorted by length of name, and certainly not by people's shoe size or anything obvious like that. 

Now on this list there may or may not be a certain person's name.  Nevermind who this person is, it's none of your business.  I can only promise you they are not some witness protection person, government spy, terrorist or alien amongst us.  Or are they...  ??? But it's not your business nonetheless.. 

You are required to find out if this certain "person's" name is on this list.  More specifically, your task is to hire someone to search this several paged list for you.  You are presented with a choice of two people to choose from, to complete this task.  You must decide which person you think would be better for the job. Here is a brief description of each candidate, for which you must use to make your hiring decision:

[b]Candidate #1: [/b]
Kayla likes brushing her teeth.  She spends no less than 2 minutes scrubbing each individual tooth, re-toothpasting her toothbrush after each tooth.  She then proceeds to floss, using a fresh string for each between-tooth crevice.  She finishes up by gargling a generous amount of mouthwash for 45 seconds, spits and repeats no less than 4 times.  Kayla used to end this all with a final mouthrinse with triple filtered, pre-boiled water, but decided a microbe might yet still exist in said liquid.  Currently she sprays the room with lysol twice in the hopes that killing 99.99% of germies twice might take care of that extra 0.01%, and simply opens mouth wide and air dries for 30 seconds.

Kayla spends most of her day going from store to store looking for the perfect carton of eggs.  She insists that there exists out there a carton of eggs with no cracked, discolored or odd smelling eggs.  She used to soley examine only the medium eggs, but after 3 years of no success, she has relented and decided to expand her search to enclude all egg sizes. 

Kayla has a foot fetish.  She likes sucking on toes.  She can't help it.  They are so small and plump and toe-y.  She especially likes it when the toes are sweaty.  Sweaty smelly feet.  Kayla believes that the smell and sweat of a foot is the ultimate expression of human carnality.  She says that sucking on toes makes her feel the most alive and connected and real. 

When Kayla is not egg hunting or toe sucking, you can usually find her at the gym.  She likes running on the treadmill while watching Oprah. She also likes doing laps around the indoor pool.  She once started a water ballet class for elderly women but one day during class when the women were underwater with their feet sticking up, Kayla lost all self control and nearly drowned one of the ladies, when after spotting a bit of green, she grabbed the lady by the leg and proceeded to suck her toes.  The classes were cancelled, and Kayla was suspended from the gym for a month.

[b]Candidate #2: [/b]
Hercules likes watching tv.  Well, his real name is Norbert Jr. but Hercules is his self-proclaimed nickname fashioned after his favorite tv show hero.  He actually likes watching Xena Warrior Princess more than Hercules, but decided it was not in his best interest to call himself Xena.  He does occasionally scream out "AIY-AIY-AIY-AIY-AIY"  when confronted by a particularly stressful situation and wishes to go into "battle" mode.  If Hercules or Xena is not on tv, then he usually has G4 or MTV on, but just as background noise.  He has a seperate tv next to his tv watching tv, for playing video games. 

He owns every video game console in existence, including every atari console, and even the fabled fantavision.  Those are all in storage though.  He has a multi-line hookup for his xbox, xbox360, playstation, playstation2, and he has a very special space reserved for the much anticipated playstation3, due out any day now.  Yep, [i]a-a-a-ny[/i] day now...  ::)

Hercules will spend hours on end watching his tv and playing his video games, getting up only to microwave himself another hotpocket or to make himself another glass of 'pixie-juice'*, or to go to the bathroom.  His current favorite game is SOCOM but he will occasionally take a break and play Balder's Gate.  He has a level 32 barbarian warrior with a 2 handed battle axe +16 fire damage.  He decided that since he couldn't call himself Xena, he would name his barbarian Xena instead. 

Hercules does not spend his entire life sitting in front of the tv enthralled in electronic bliss.  He is an avid rollerblade fan, engaging in several bouts of street hockey a week, with his friends.  He also likes spending time with his girlfriend Lena, though she has almost broken up with him countless times due to his constant efforts to get her to change her name to Xena.  In his defense, it does not help that on occasion she indulges his fancy and screams the Xena battle cry for him whilste in the sack.

[i][color=gray]* Pixie-juice is made when you fill a glass up with apple juice and dump 10-15 pixie-stix into it. Mix well.  Note: Hercules actually prefers the taste of powerade mountain blast with pixie-stix better, but he likes to use apple juice instead, because he finds it particularly amusing that the liquid that goes out of his body later on is the same color as the liquid that goes into his body.  [/color][/i]

___

So there you have it, those are your two candidates for the job.  You must decide which person you will hire, and why.

[zq29]

I'd personally go with Norbert Jr.

Why? Well, I think Kayla would actually read all of the pages, line by line, examining each word to ensure that she has a match or not. 'Hercules', I would imagine, has some form of knowledge with computers maybe? Maybe he knows a little programming? He'd just scan the pages, use some OCR software to convert the scans to text files, and write a script thats less than 5 lines long to do the work for him. Although, that is assuming he hhas some knowledge with computers and programming, if he hasn't, he probably wouldn't get around to even reading the first page.

[ober]

That was my conclusion.  The only reason to go with Kayla is the fact that she'd probably quickly devise a system of sorts to manage the data and narrow it down quickly.  But... I doubt it.

[AndyB]

Kayla - hired in a flash.  Obviously someone who is anally uni-tasking and refuses to stop until 'the end' no matter how seemingly trivial the quest.  Properly motivated, Kayla will be perfect for this task.  Perhaps telling her that the name I wanted her to search for was the person who owned the suckiest feet, or that if she found the name then I would personally .... whatever.

[zq29]

I found it odd that someone who goes to great lengths to clean the inside of their mouth enjoys sucking toes. And prefers sweaty, smelly ones at that!

[.josh]

i've posted this question on 6 different boards and you're the first person to notice that.

[ober]

Eh... I noticed it too... just didn't comment on it.  I'm sure most others were the same.