extrovertive Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 Student Suspended Over Suspected Use of PHPTopeka, KS - High school sophomore Brett Tyson was suspended today after teachers learned he may be using PHP."A teacher overheard him say that he was using PHP, and as part of our Zero-Tolerance policy against drug use, he was immediately suspended. No questions asked," said Principal Clyde Thurlow. "We're not quite sure what PHP is, but we suspect it may be a derivative of PCP, or maybe a new designer drug like GHB."Parents are frightened by the discovery of this new menace in their children's school, and are demanding the school do something. "We heard that he found out about PHP at school on the internet. There may even be a PHP web ring operating on school grounds," said irate parent Carol Blessing. "School is supposed to be teaching our kids how to read and write. Not about dangerous drugs like PHP."In response to parental demands the school has reconfigured its internet WatchDog software to block access to all internet sites mentioning PHP. Officials say this should prevent any other students from falling prey like Brett Tyson did. They have also stepped up locker searches and brought in drug sniffing dogs.Interviews with students suggested that PHP use is wide spread around the school, but is particularly concentrated in the geeky nerd population. When contacted by BBspot.com, Brett Tyson said, "I don't know what the hell is going on dude, but this suspension gives me more time for fraggin'. Yee haw!"PHP is a hypertext preprocessor, which sounds very dangerous. It is believed that many users started by using Perl and moved on to the more powerful PHP. For more information on how to recognize if your child may be using PHP visit php.net. Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daniel0 Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 Is this for real or is it a joke article? Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-112706 Share on other sites More sharing options...
.josh Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 obviously it is a joke article. I mean come on, even if the first part were real, by the time you get to this part: "the school has reconfigured its internet WatchDog software to block access to all internet sites mentioning PHP." One would think that the person in charge of implementing it would explain how retarded they are being. Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-112746 Share on other sites More sharing options...
obsidian Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 that's awesome! whoever came up with that is pretty clever. is it original with you, extrovertive? Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-112748 Share on other sites More sharing options...
wildteen88 Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 I've seen this before. Cant remeber where though, I think I either got of off digg.com or forgetfoo.comHowever if this is true the school is pretty lame! The IT guys at the school should surely know what PHP is. Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-113251 Share on other sites More sharing options...
ober Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 I saw it on forgetfoo... do you visit that often, wildteen? Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-113257 Share on other sites More sharing options...
wildteen88 Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 I used to go there quiote often. But I dont visit forgetfoo that often now. Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-113261 Share on other sites More sharing options...
redbullmarky Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 it's from BBSpot.com, but it says in the article:[quote]When contacted by BBspot.com, Brett Tyson said[/quote]pretty funny :) Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-113285 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nitroware Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 That is really funny! I was laughing the whole time. I am just thinking about how retarded the people at the school are. Link to comment https://forums.phpfreaks.com/topic/24688-student-suspended-for-using-php/#findComment-115095 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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