kellz Posted November 6, 2007 Share Posted November 6, 2007 hey all I was having an argument with my PSE teacher about this subject and she thinks basically at my age (nearly 15) we're not old enough to erm.. *do it* anyway no I didn't *do it*! But still I think the age of consent should be lower. It's kind of harsh to make laws for people that can think for them self when it comes to something like this because what if you love that person? shouldn't you be FREE to do what you like sexually without some idiot's coming along and getting in the way of your relationship? It's not like people my age don't know the difference between "yes" and "no" we can easily refuse something if we don't want it, however we are not given that choice all we're allowed to say is "no" because of this stupid law made by people that are trying to run our life And statutory rape really gets me mad because it's always the male that's arrested for it, didn't they ever think maybe THE GIRL allowed it? it's just as much her fault as it is his.. Well if my bf was older than me and that happened and they tried to send him to prison i would be really mad and accuse the judge of feeling me and stuff so he goes to prison too! I'm actually serious, this law shouldn't continue because I think at my age we are old enough to know what we are saying and being 18 doesn't make much difference, all it does is give you the right to sleep with everything that has a heart beat. what do you think? and quit obeying the law before you do it! I want people's real opinions not opinions because "its law" defeats the point in my post. thank you p.s: the age of consent here is 16 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trq Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 But still I think the age of consent should be lower. It's kind of harsh to make laws for people that can think for them self when it comes to something like this because what if you love that person? One issue is at the ripe old age of 15, you may think your in love, but in all honesty, your not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neylitalo Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 A warning: If this goes even remotely NSFW, it will get closed and removed very quickly. While laws may seem like they're unfair, extreme, or otherwise ridiculous, keep in mind that the law is probably only going to be enforced in situations that warrant it. Any age-related law, in my opinion, is fundamentally flawed. The general idea behind them is to make sure that the people affected have reached a level of maturity to make an intelligent decision, and maybe to prevent health/safety risks - but human nature is that everybody is different. Some people are more mature at 12 than others are at 20. Note that I am not saying, by any means, that the laws should be disregarded due to their flaws. And I hate to get into this argument, but I think your teacher is absolutely right. I can't think of a single situation where almost-15 is a reasonable age. Excluding the traditional "just because", the main reason I think this is that teenagers (under 17-ish) lack the maturity to consider all of the options, determine the consequences, and then handle the consequences when they arise. With so much at stake, emotionally and physically, you really need the emotional maturity to deal with broken hearts, hurt feelings, and any of the physical and physiological consequences that are associated with it. There's precious little more unfortunate than a kid with a broken, twisted view of the world, and potential catalysts like this just aren't worth the risk. And on a completely different (but completely true) note: It's actually really over-rated until you're older anyway. :-\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teng84 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 you will understand everything when you're on th right age ok I'm 22 and turning 23 and i still made some mistake how about 16??? In my country marrying women with sexual experience sometimes is a prob dont wanna elaborate more with that but (they will look at u like a slut) my brother is 21 with one kid he thought is doing fine i keep on telling him stop his bad habit yah know girls and friends (tons of friends) and he no i know what i'm doing so i dont wanna bit him coz i love my only bro but one time the girl get pregnant and so he has to marry thi girl..... now he keep on telling me KUYA (term for brother) if only i listen to you !!! all his ambitions are gone have a car, go to other country, have a own house and lots more i hate this story every time i see my brother he is sad and like thingking something and looking nowhere i feel what he feel coz im the KUYA i serve as his second parent and this should not happen to anybody Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wsantos Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 I've been there ... and I only laugh at the memories... (short word ... deep thought...if you can't understand how much more your question) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kellz Posted November 7, 2007 Author Share Posted November 7, 2007 Making it legal would NOT suddenly turn us all into "sluts" I think there's just as much chance a person of legal consent will sleep around allot too (and they do) the only difference is that they are allowed to and nobody forced them to do it (ok in some circumstances they did) but apart from that it was their choice to do it. People in america think it's ok to have sexual intercourse at 18 (because it's legal then) and people here think it's ok to do it at 16, it's like they are not giving their very own opinion, more like what the law wants them to say, if the legal age was 15 everyone would be like "o yea 15 is ok because then you understand everything..bla bla bla" but no its "o yea 16 is ok because then you understand everything..bla bla bla" and in america "o yea 18 is ok because then you understand everything..bla bla bla" ??? almost like everyone is brainwashed and doesn't have any original opinion... p.s: locking this post all goes to show how far you can take this so called "freedom of speech" in this horrible world. very thin line isn't it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neylitalo Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 p.s: locking this post all goes to show how far you can take this so called "freedom of speech" in this horrible world. very thin line isn't it? Just in case you were wondering, it hasn't been locked. I said I would lock it if it got NSFW, and I hardly think that's unreasonable. We have rules here, and NSFW would definitely violate them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KevinM1 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Making it legal would NOT suddenly turn us all into "sluts" I think there's just as much chance a person of legal consent will sleep around allot too (and they do) the only difference is that they are allowed to and nobody forced them to do it (ok in some circumstances they did) but apart from that it was their choice to do it. People in america think it's ok to have sexual intercourse at 18 (because it's legal then) and people here think it's ok to do it at 16, it's like they are not giving their very own opinion, more like what the law wants them to say, if the legal age was 15 everyone would be like "o yea 15 is ok because then you understand everything..bla bla bla" but no its "o yea 16 is ok because then you understand everything..bla bla bla" and in america "o yea 18 is ok because then you understand everything..bla bla bla" ??? almost like everyone is brainwashed and doesn't have any original opinion... p.s: locking this post all goes to show how far you can take this so called "freedom of speech" in this horrible world. very thin line isn't it? You're not thinking this through. The age of consent isn't just some arbitrary number that some old, stuffy people picked just for fun. Generally speaking, the age of consent is the age at which society feels young people can make reasonably informed decisions about their own health (assuming you live in a country that's not ruled by religious dogma). It is arrived at after much debate and discourse. And, like most things involving the law, the age of consent can be changed (lowered) if the people feel it needs to be changed. There is wisdom to be found in the "You'll understand when you're older" truism. People don't say it because they're brainwashed, they say it because they've gained enough life experience to realize that they most likely made some poor decisions as a teenager, some of which may have had long lasting effects (teen pregnancy, for one, to say nothing of diseases). This isn't about older people trying to stop teens from having fun, which seems to be what you're implying. Rather, it's about older people trying to enforce some boundaries as, inevitably, some older people will attempt to exploit the young. Teens are vulnerable because they think they can make rational, informed decisions on matters of this level of importance. Unfortunately, most cannot. Instead, they succumb to the pressures of teen life. I've seen it myself -- a 14 year old girl 'dating' a 21+ year old guy, because he drives, can get her alcohol, and generally makes her look cool in the eyes of her peers ("OMG, she's dating a college guy!"). She convinces herself that he really does care for her, but in reality he's just with her for the cheap, easy thrill. This scenario played itself out a lot when I was in high school. Consent laws are made, in part, to protect naive teens and children from the scumbags who would exploit them. Is this all patronizing? Perhaps. But, in the long run, having consent laws is beneficial to society as a whole. RE: locking this thread -- freedom of speech doesn't apply in this case. The PHP Freaks can do what they wish with whatever messages you write as it's their message board. It's something you're going to have to get used to, as most businesses don't exercise complete freedom of speech either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
448191 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 NSFWhatyatalkin? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kellz Posted November 7, 2007 Author Share Posted November 7, 2007 NSFWhatyatalkin? Not Safe For Work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
effigy Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 For the same reason youth are not allowed to drive automobiles, perform surgery, fly a space shuttle, become president, or vote, and that's that. At a young age you don't have the experience to understand what you're getting yourself into; even in old age you may not understand! I think neylitalo said the magic phrase: "physical and physiological consequences." You've got your entire life ahead of you and so so much to learn. What's the rush? "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so." -- Douglas Adams Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roopurt18 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 She convinces herself that he really does care for her, but in reality he's just with her for the cheap, easy thrill. This scenario played itself out a lot when I was in high school. Consent laws are made, in part, to protect naive teens and children from the scumbags who would exploit them. This is the main point behind age of consent laws. The problem is that the majority of young people make very, very, very bad decisions and very, very, very rarely learn anything from them. When you are young you feel invulnerable to everything. Age of consent laws are there to protect you from what are essentially predators: men (and women) that prey on the naivety of younger people. The best class I took in college was arguably Human Sexuality. One of the topics we covered was that of projection, which is a psychological behavior almost all humans engage in. It works like this, in your head you have an image of what the ideal man or woman is. Then you meet someone and are physically attracted to them. Initially, all you see are their good qualities. What you are actually doing is mentally projecting the image of your ideal mate on this new person; you are fooling yourself into thinking they are what they might not be. Sometimes this is referred to as infatuation. And it lasts a good deal of time, 4 to 6 weeks on average. You might notice that most couples (all ages) only date for 1 to 2 months before calling it off. What happens is you start seeing that person for who they really are and not who you wanted them to be; eventually you realize you don't like them so much after all. You're young, you can make mistakes, you have your whole life to bounce back from one, right? Well not all the time. Some mistakes simply can't be undone. Here's my advice: keep your pants on and take your time with things. Date someone for a long time before you decide to be more intimate with them, at least 2 months. Learn to see people for who they are and not who you want them to be. Some STDs are for life. Lastly, should you become pregnant, a guy can easily walk away from that situation while you're stuck with the consequences, abortion or not. You may not like it but you're hitting that age where one bad mistake can take a gigantic toll on your life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roopurt18 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Date someone for a long time before you decide to be more intimate with them, at least 2 months. I just wanted to clarify this statement. 2 months is not a long time by any means. I don't think anyone your age should be having sex; no matter what you think, you're just not smart enough to realize what you're getting yourself into. That 2 months I spoke of is for people who are already ready to have sex. There are tons of people who jump into new relationships, have sex way too early, and then the relationships ends. Many of them feel bad about sex with a non-committing partner. The reason is because they had sex during that infatuation phase. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hcdarkmage Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Nightslyr and neylitalo have a point. The age of consent is set up by society and what they deem as morally ethical. It's like the voting age. Society believes that age restrictions should be enforced because "younger people" think they know the consequences, but are only seeing the short-term effects of their actions. When I was a teen (some years ago) my friends and I lived by farmers and went to school with some of them. The "Driving Age" for people who worked on farms is a lot lower than the "Legal Driving Age". Society has deemed that farm children are more responsible than city children. I think it has something to do with their chores. Any way, it is the effective amount of "maturity" that society deems "worthy" of these privileges. Rambling aside . . . where I'm from: the legal driving age is 16, the voting age is 18, the smoking age is 19 and the drinking age is 21, but you can get married at 16 (or was it 14 with consenting permission from the parents or gaurdians?). I have seen many accidents from the 16-year-old drivers, mostly around noon, and society is thinking of raising the driving age to 18 because they don't believe that the 16-year-olds have enough maturity. I think that is stupid because I see more accidents from the older folks (the elderly between the ages of 60 and 90) and society is not worried about them. Then again there was one accident from a teen that decided to over load his 4-passenger car with 6 people (4 in front, 2 in the trunk). That shows a level of immaturity that makes me want to vote for the change in the driving age. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
obsidian Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Not to stir the pot any, but keep in mind that the age of consent is also different based on culture. I grew up overseas, so I was exposed to many different cultures, and what is very interesting to me is those that have an "age of consent" law typically reflect the maturity of their youth in the age chosen. I know that for the most part (and yes, I am American and still say this), our culture is one of the most immature and selfish cultures I have been around. I'm not saying this strictly about the youth; I'm saying that as a general rule. That immaturity seems to be recognized in the laws about age of consent as well as drinking, driving and any curfew or other lawful age limitations put on something. If you think about it, it also serves to protect the younger ones, too. I know of several girls who were "active" when they were 14-15. The law doesn't state that they are not allowed to do that, but it discourages them from it, and it discourages those older men who would otherwise take advantage of them, too. When you think about it from that perspective, you realize that it's actually meant to be a protection rather than a limitation. One other note in response to the several comments about people that age not being smart enough, etc... As with anything in life, there are always going to be those few exceptions of people who honestly may have the knowledge or wisdom at that age to know exactly what they are getting into, but that is by no means normative. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roopurt18 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 As with anything in life, there are always going to be those few exceptions of people who honestly may have the knowledge or wisdom at that age to know exactly what they are getting into, but that is by no means normative. I'd say that if they really understood what they were getting into and possible consequences, then they'd choose to wait until they were older and had less on their plate, so to speak. I know that's what I did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
obsidian Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 I'd say that if they really understood what they were getting into and possible consequences, then they'd choose to wait until they were older and had less on their plate, so to speak. I know that's what I did. I fully agree, and I did as well... but that further proves my point, because if everyone were that understanding and mature in their decisions, there would be no need for that age of consent anyway ;-) lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GingerRobot Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 When I was a teen (some years ago) my friends and I lived by farmers and went to school with some of them. The "Driving Age" for people who worked on farms is a lot lower than the "Legal Driving Age". Society has deemed that farm children are more responsible than city children. I think it has something to do with their chores. Any way, it is the effective amount of "maturity" that society deems "worthy" of these privileges. I would imagine that's actually to do with the ownership of land. It certainly is here. If someone owns a piece of land, they're perfectly entitled to let someone of whatever age drive around on it, regardless of licence/ability to drive etc. The law applies to people driving on public roads. As for the comment on older drivers causing more accidents - bring in retests every 5 years i say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kellz Posted November 7, 2007 Author Share Posted November 7, 2007 Here's my advice: keep your pants on and take your time with things. Date someone for a long time before you decide to be more intimate with them, at least 2 months. Learn to see people for who they are and not who you want them to be. Some STDs are for life. Lastly, should you become pregnant, a guy can easily walk away from that situation while you're stuck with the consequences, abortion or not. You may not like it but you're hitting that age where one bad mistake can take a gigantic toll on your life. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years and some months (sinse i was 12) and he doesn't try to rush me into anything.. actually it's always him that says "not yet" which is odd ??? I know I shouldn't do anything ..erm.. yea you know doesn't have to be sex but "other" stuff.. it's just that I don't know how to please him but I want to it's very rare we argue and if we do we always end up back together and his mother even let me go on holidays with him and his family^^ Some of my friends show off about thing's that they have done so I'm like "yea..yea ok kewl" because I don't have anything to say because I haven't done the thing's they say they did so it's like I'm the odd 1 out.. And *if* me and my bf did do anything I wouldn't brag about it (and if he did i'd cut his *cough* off!) but I know he's not like that anyway! err I don't know if I'm even making sense :-\ basically I just don't know how to please him and I know he probably wants to do more than just kiss and go up my top but he doesn't say it and if i say it he's all like "not yet", am I even allowed to say this? I don't know who else to talk to like this but I definitely would NOT express myself in the "real world" the way I can on the internet.. it's like an escape rout and I can tell people how I really feel and I can put away my fake smile that I use daily just to keep everyone else happy. ugh maybe Ive gone totally of the subject.. besides I only get accused for feeling sorry for myself if i even attempt it. btw, i love the spell checking thing when I'm writing, it makes me feel clever lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roopurt18 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 I wouldn't worry about your friends. You're in high school. 1 year after you graduate, there is a good chance you won't be in contact with 90% of the people you knew in school. 5 years or later and you probably won't know a single one of them. Be smart and look after yourself, no one else will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hcdarkmage Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years and some months (sinse i was 12) and he doesn't try to rush me into anything.. actually it's always him that says "not yet" which is odd Odd is not the word I would have selected. Unique is a good word. It is very rare that the male is the one that wants to wait. When I was in High School, my (ex)girlfriend thought that it would please me if she could get me alone and let me "go all the way". Well . . . I was brought up in a (some what) morally manor and I decided to say "no". That is just my upbringing. I waited until I was married before my first time. When I was dating her, midway through our Senior year, she had an "problem" with an older guy that caused us to break up. I regretted it for a while, but after school let out fro the summer, we got together and talked and I decided to take it to the next level and asked her to marry me. I went off to college (tech school to be more precise) and she sends me a letter 3 months after I left saying she will make all the arrangements for our marriage. One week before I graduated (it was a one-year course), She sends me a letter and calls the whole thing off, never explaining why. Depression is something I would not suggest. It took me 2 years to recover from that blow. I found someone new and . . . wallah . . . I am happily married with two little boys. I have seen her twice since our breakup, and each time she tells me she regrets it. I don't. I went through the pain and worked past all that. And I am glad that I said no. I don't think I could have handled the disappointment that I would have felt if I had gone all the way with her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kellz Posted November 7, 2007 Author Share Posted November 7, 2007 I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years and some months (sinse i was 12) and he doesn't try to rush me into anything.. actually it's always him that says "not yet" which is odd Odd is not the word I would have selected. Unique is a good word. It is very rare that the male is the one that wants to wait. When I was in High School, my (ex)girlfriend thought that it would please me if she could get me alone and let me "go all the way". Well . . . I was brought up in a (some what) morally manor and I decided to say "no". That is just my upbringing. I waited until I was married before my first time. When I was dating her, midway through our Senior year, she had an "problem" with an older guy that caused us to break up. I regretted it for a while, but after school let out fro the summer, we got together and talked and I decided to take it to the next level and asked her to marry me. I went off to college (tech school to be more precise) and she sends me a letter 3 months after I left saying she will make all the arrangements for our marriage. One week before I graduated (it was a one-year course), She sends me a letter and calls the whole thing off, never explaining why. Depression is something I would not suggest. It took me 2 years to recover from that blow. I found someone new and . . . wallah . . . I am happily married with two little boys. I have seen her twice since our breakup, and each time she tells me she regrets it. I don't. I went through the pain and worked past all that. And I am glad that I said no. I don't think I could have handled the disappointment that I would have felt if I had gone all the way with her. Thats so sad! *hugs* but atleast you found someone now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teng84 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 when i was 16 i thought im in love and im about to marry(live in ) my 20 yr old GF but glad i made a wise decision i don't. one day we meet she has 4 kids and she doesn't look happy. and you can see how hard their life is that if they dont work for to day then they will not eat.. I cant imagine my self on that situation. now at my age i dont think im ready for being into that serious relationship.. life is not computer where you can ctr+z life is cool enjoy it and everything will come on the right time note scientifically proven (minor who's engage with sexual activity get addicted with it eeewww I'm not gonna marry a girl like that yuckyyyy i wont lick someones ice cream ) and i guess that is what age consent is all about Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daniel0 Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 life is not computer where you can ctr+z Why would you suspend your life? o_O So is suicide a SIGKILL? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deanznet Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Let me tell you a little story here Alright their was this guy right.. Working a job up on a tower.. it was dangerous 2 people fell to their deaths but he was getting paid $30 an hour so he didn't care. Anyways Saturday came around and he went to a party, Anyway he and this girl meet.. I mean she was Hot, he was enjoying her company and im sure she was enjoying his.. anyways after some time they decide to get a hotel.. he ask her to see her license to make sure she 18.. and she shows him and he shows her.. anyway they stated to go an the girl ask to get some beer.. but he was only 18 but the girl said dont worry about it the lady who works at the gas station knows me and she gives it to me all the time.. So they got the beer and went to the hotel.. spend the night did what they did.. the next day he was arrested.. got out on bail.. Asked the laywer what kind of trouble he was in Said he was in for rape. The girl was only 14 with a fake id.. He could get life in jail times 2... Just a little story i wanted to share.. not sure if its related Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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